What's The Nudge?
I have been using all methods of persuasion throughout my years as a church leader. It involves verbal and nonverbal communication in formal and informal settings. I have presented ministry ideas on paper, through email, texts and over the telephone. There have been numerous one-on-one meetings with key individuals, and there have been even more meetings with committees, teams and multiple groups covering tasks with diverse responsibilities.
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The goal
behind all this activity has been to facilitate collaboration and hopefully
gain “buy-in” to ideas, action plans, implementation strategies, and the advancement
of the organization’s mission. I have found this process both exhilarating and
exasperating. It requires patience, support, and openness to divergent ideas. The
latter has always been a particular challenge to me and to my impatience! But I
have found all of this to be a necessary process for getting things done!
I have
been a student of communication all my life since receiving a bachelor's degree
in Speech Communication in college. I am fascinated by innovative ideas, systems,
and models for sending and receiving information. Our eldest son, Matt, is also
on his own journey to becoming a better communicator and leader. He has been in
a stimulating and stretching process of professional development for the past
two years through the Harvard Kennedy School of Public Policy and Government.
While the courses have been demanding, he has been excelling and growing in his
skills of persuasive communication.
During a
recent conversation, Matt shared a new idea with me called, “The Nudge.” I told
him that I had been “nudged and shoved” numerous times at theme parks, crowded sport
venues, and even at the grocery store while waiting in line! And I never felt
positive whenever I have experienced an unwelcomed bump from behind! That’s not
what this kind of nudge means!
The concept
of “nudge theory,” as used in communication, is “a purposeful intervention meant
to make it easier for people to do what they want to do anyway.” I admit that I
have had many instances where I tried to bully, ignore, and otherwise benevolently
force my ideas upon others. You can imagine the outcome. Most of us don’t take
kindly to “strong arm tactics” and they are usually unsuccessful in the end!
How do we
give a well-received nudge? Respect others and their ideas. Listen and restate
the ideas back to the sender to make sure you understood what was said. Be
patient and expect this collaborative approach to take more time. Ask questions
for clarification. Most of us want to be valued as members of a team.
When evaluating
an idea, compliment it with sincerity. Always “dissect” the idea and not the
person sharing it! “Treating others the way you want to be treated” is still
the Golden Rule for relating! Be willing to question yourself and even accept a
change in the ideas you have shared. Invite feedback. Group decisions are
usually stronger and will often look different than the original idea on the table!
Compromise is not a dirty idea. Win-win is a better strategy to get buy-in and
followship.
The
Apostle Paul was a leader with vision and focus. He had dreams and ideas that
God blessed. Yet, Paul partnered with a team of many others who helped to implement
those ideas and turn them into vibrant church plants and countless changed
lives! Paul modeled and spoke often about having a gentle spirit. He said, “Let
your words become beautiful gifts (constructive) that encourage others; do this
by speaking words of grace to help them.” (Ephesians 4:29b, The Passion Translation).
This sounds like Paul’s idea of “The Nudge!”
The college
basketball season is ending. The brackets of March Madness have distilled down
to a Final Four. Paul frequently used sports analogies in his writings. Take
note that he never “hogged the ball” in ministry. Paul was a total team player.
He “passed the ball” and allowed others to contribute. Romans 16 is an example
of how readily Paul commended, complimented, and valued his team!
Let’s try persuading
others with a gentle nudge next time! Respectfully lead others in such a way
that each decision-maker feels valued. Help them feel that their ideas
contributed to the collective whole!
Mike Keppler, retired pastor,
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It takes a long of team work, we are blessed with many at our Wesley Methodist church. They have blessed us in so many ways. So very thankful
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